Saturday, 19 September 2015

Reasons Why The Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials Sucked

Last night, I saw The Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials. It sucked. It was sucktastic to the highest level. Well, maybe not the highest level. That would be the Percy Jackson movies. Here are a few reasons why it sucked.

1. The Accuracy

It sucked lemon lollipops. That's all I have to say. Just go read the books and be happy. Never see the movie again.

2. The Characters As They're Portrayed In The Movie

Thomas: The Wimp Who Would Die If He Were On His Own
Minho: The Humorous One
Newt: He's just kind of there...
Teresa: The Traitorous Girl With Supermodel Good Looks
Frypan: The Black Guy
Winston: The Brown One Who Dies
Brenda: The Bad*** Girl
Jorge: The Adult
Ava Paige: The Evil Adult Leader
Janson: The One Who Lied And Was WCKD The Whole Time

3. The Cranks

Okay, what I didn't get was why a virus made them zombies. I mean, in the books, the Cranks were insane. Smart, but insane. In the movies, they were lumbering blood-thirsty zombies who wanted nothing more than to kill the kids from the Glade.
The second thing is just their being. If they're hiding in the underground mall, then fine. That makes sense. But why do they only come out when someone turns on their flashlight or turn on the power? I mean, are they light/motion activated like robots? That makes no sense.
Another thing. When you are chasing someone, and you have an abundance of people to chase this person with, CHASE THEM FROM ALL SIDES! Do not come from just the back and give them a perfect opportunity to run for it! I mean, the Cranks are fast, too, so why don't you just surround them?

4. The Plot

The plot was actually pretty stupid. They basically escaped from an inescapable prison, conveniently walked towards a mall with shelter from the sandstorm, found supplies there, ran into the zombie virused people that will attack them if they get the chance, then found out from some random strangers that they just met that they have to go and find some people called The Right Arm who can help save them all. Hmmm..... Something sounds

5. THEIR AIM

Okay, let's get this straight. If you have fifty men with guns, and you have a perfect shot at one of the people you want to shoot, then shoot. I mean, if you're armed, then you must have had some kind of training in the past, right? Well, it certainly didn't look that way. And that's just the bad guys.
If you are trying to stop the bad guys from escaping, and they have captured all of your own men and put them in a giant helicarrier that has huge engines, then shoot the engines! I mean, without all the engines functional, then it's a bit hard for you to take off. It's also incredibly easy to hit the engines if you have a MACHINE GUN!

6. The Reality Of The Situations

"Oh, look! Zombie people are peeling themselves off of the walls! Let's watch them. Ooh! There's a few more! Wow, look at them. They're walking now. Towards us... do you think we should run? Nah. Let's just watch some more." No. Just no. If something is coming for you, RUN! Run your feet off you idiots! Do not just stand and watch them advance on you! IDIOTS! Ugh! It's rediculous. And that was basically half of the movie. Staring and watching as the bad guys, or the evil zombies are chasing you.